Hourman
Ralphie
by Starsky Hutch 76
May 25, 1965
Dad told me I’m going to have a new Mom. He’s going to marry his friend Wendi who has been coming over here to visit. She’s pretty and makes him laugh, which he used to not do much, so I’m glad they’re getting married.
When I asked Dad why I didn’t have a mom like other kids, he told me my mom lives up in heaven with the angels. He showed me pictures and said her name was Beverly.
It’ll be good to have a mom who’s alive like the kids at school. Maybe they won’t make fun of me so much. But I hope my mom who lives up in Heaven with the angels won’t be made at me for calling Wendi Mom.
***
February 7, 1966
Mom and Dad brought home a new baby brother for me today! I’m so excited! He was all tiny and squirmy and pink, but Mom says he’ll be big enough to play with some day. I can’t wait. I wish they’d let me hold him. I’d be careful.
***
August 24, 1976
Rick and I were playing Batman and Robin today. I thought I should get to be Batman cause I’m oldest. Rick said I was too stupid to be Batman even if I was a grown up. Boy did dad let him have it. After that, Rick didn’t want to play anymore. I don’t like it when Rick is upset so I said I’d be Robin. Rick said lets be Wildcat and Atom. I told him he had to be Atom cause he was shortest and he said OK.
***
September 1, 1976
Boy was dad mad at when they got back from the Trevors’ house! He and a bunch of the other JSA people’s kids stole Wonder Woman’s invisible jet and drove it all over the place! Boy that sounds like fun! Wish I could have been there like Rick, but my group with all my friends who are like me was going to the zoo and I didn’t want to miss the animals. That sounded cooler, though, and I missed out! I wouldn’t have liked getting yelled at like he is, though. Plus he got grounded again. Rick’s always getting grounded.
***
December 12, 1976
Mom is mad at Dad for coming out of retirement. She says he’s too old to be playing dress up. He says the world still needs Hourman. She says, “No, Rex Tyler needs Hourman.” Now they’re just giving each other mean looks but at least they’re not yelling no more. I hate when they fight.
***
January 13, 1980
Rick won’t ever play super heroes anymore. He says it’s kid stuff. He won’t play action figures, either. At least he’ll still ride bikes and play video games. But I miss some of the fun stuff we used to do. Mom says he’s becoming a teenager so he’s outgrowing it. I never did, so I wish he wouldn’t.
***
February 28, 1983
Dad and Rick fight all the time now. Rick’s pretty mean to me some times, too. He won’t let me come in his room any more and he never wants to play games with me or ride bikes like we used to. It’s always, “Ralphie get out” or “Ralphie don’t touch my stuff. You’ll break it.” He thinks he’s so grown up now, but I’m still the oldest.
***
July 1985
The skies are all red and everyone says it’s the end of the world. I sure hope not. Everyone is so scared. I hope dad and the rest of the JSA can handle it OK. Mom is crying a lot. She’s afraid dad’s going to get himself killed like the Crimson Avenger did.
***
August 1985
Dad is mad at Rick again. He started taking dad’s miraclo and calling himself Hourman. Mom says he’s mad and proud at the same time. I don’t understand how you can be mad at someone and still be proud of them. He joined Infinity Inc. and is a super hero, too, now. I haven’t met all of them but I’ve seen them on TV. My favorite is Brainwave Jr. He has the best costume. I like Northwind, too. He has wings. I think Jade is pretty and she has green skin.
***
September 1985
Rick’s got a new girlfriend. Her name is Beth. She’s real pretty and smart. She’s a doctor! Rick’s so lucky. I don’t think I’ll ever have a girlfriend like her. But there is a girl in my group I like. Her name is Mandy. She’s not as pretty as Beth but she’s still pretty.
Rick and Beth take me to the park some times. I might ask if I can bring Mandy next time.
***
January 16, 1986
Rick is sad. He can’t take Miraclo anymore because it’s making him real sick. Now he can’t be Hourman like Dad. I wish he could. I don’t like it when Rick is sad. He never smiles anymore. Beth doesn’t smile much anymore either. She tries to cheer him up, but nothing helps and that makes her sad, too.
***
March 1, 1986
Rick got his powers back some how. They explained it but I didn’t really understand. It had something to do with dad’s last big adventure with the JSA when he was away for awhile. Dad made a birthday wish for Rick a few weeks ago and someone named Odin made it come true. I’m glad dad helped him get his powers back even if he did use his superhero name without asking. Rick is gonna call himself Surge now, so that’s OK. He and Beth both have new costumes, too. They look really neat. Beth has long hair now, too.
***
July 8, 1986
Rick and Beth are upset about something. I don’t know what it is. I think they’ve been fighting. It’s usually so fun when Rick and Beth come to take me to the park or the zoo. But now everyone’s unhappy.
Whenever mom was unhappy like that, it was usually something I’d done to stress her out. I asked Beth if I’d done something wrong. She smiled at me but still looked sort of sad and kissed me on the cheek and said “No, honey, you didn’t do anything wrong.”
I know I shouldn’t have been spying on their private conversations, but I wanted to know why they were so unhappy. I heard Beth tell Rick he was too young and she had worked too hard to get where she was to give it all up and they weren’t ready. She also said, “What if it’s like Ralphie? Your dad took miraclo, too, and look what happened.”
Rick got mad and said, “We don’t know that it had anything to do with that.”
I didn’t understand what they meant. What if what’s like me? Beth told me I didn’t do anything wrong.
When they brought me home, Rick was talking to dad and he blew his top. He told Rick he was too young, too, and called him, “damn irresponsible”. He hadn’t called Rick that in a long time so I knew he must be really mad. Rick called him a racist, which made him even madder. “I’ve never said anything about her being black and you know it!” he yelled. “It’s you I have the problem with.”
“What else is new,” Rick said.
***
July 21, 1986
Rick moved out! I was so mad I just screamed and screamed! I went in to dad’s study and told him it was all his fault for the way he’s been yelling at Rick. I felt real bad after because I could tell dad was sad about it, too.
He sat me down and talked to me like I was a grown up for the first time ever. He told me Rick and Beth were going to have a baby! I couldn’t believe it! I don’t understand why everyone’s so sad. I remember how happy I was when Rick came home when he was a baby. In a few years there could be someone to play with again. Rick and Beth love each other and are having a baby. Why isn’t everyone happy about this?
***
August 20, 1986
I asked Rick when he was going to move back in. He said he wasn’t ever moving back into the house which made me sad. I had hoped he and Beth would move back in with the baby they are going to have so I could play with it every day.
He said he has been living at Stellar Studios until he and Beth can get a place together. He told me he and Beth are going to have to get married. I said “Well, duh,” and he looked at me sort of surprised. I don’t know why. I always knew they were going to get married some day.
***
September 10, 1986
Beth and Rick got married today! I got to be best man. I was so afraid I was gonna lose the ring or worse. I kept taking it out to look at it so I’d know I hadn’t lost it. Both our families were there, plus dad’s friends in the JSA in, Rick’s Infinity Inc. friends, and Beth’s friends from the hospital. For once, everyone didn’t seem upset or mad. It was nice. Dad even grabbed Rick in a big hug after it was over at the reception.
***
October 1, 1986
Boy is Beth looking big these days! She laughs and says it’s a good thing she’s taking time off from Infinity Inc. cause she’d look funny in that belly baring uniform. She let me touch her stomach and I felt the baby kick. That was weird but kind of cool. Dad and Rick get along real good these days. Mom jokes and says she’s too young and beautiful to be a grandmother and what will her adoring fans say about Wendi Tyler being a grandmaw?
This made Dad laugh. He said they’d say she’s the sexiest granny ever.
***
December 31, 1986
It’s a boy! I was hoping it would be! They named him Zachary Rex Tyler. Zach after Beth’s Grandad and Rex after dad.
I can’t wait until he’s bigger. I’m going to teach him all sorts of games. I hope he’ll like Nintendo and playing make believe. Rick is smiling like crazy these days and Beth looks happy too.
***
January 24, 1987
Mom, Dad, and me went to visit Rick and Beth at their new place. Beth and Mom had just fed and changed Zach and put him to bed and come back into the living room. Dad and Rick were talking about whether Zach might have powers in the dark like Beth… she can see in the dark but not light… or be super strong when he needed it like Rick.
Suddenly, we heard a loud crack and we all ran to the baby’s room and looked to see what happened. Beth flipped on the light and we all gasped when we saw what happened. He had snapped one of the bars of the baby bed in two when the lights were out.
Dad stared at Zach real surprised and said, “If I were you two, I’d invest in a night light for that one.” The rest of us kept watching as Zach’s little hand moved to another bar. It didn’t break, like the last one. I started to back up and bumped into the light switch and the lights went out and then we all heard another loud crack!
