Minute Man
Every Minute Counts
by Libbylawrence
Part 3 of Revenge, Inc.
Continued from Mister Scarlet: Scarlet Woman
Jack Weston kicked the hulking brute who was choking him. He kicked him above the belt and then slugged him with a swift left.
“Sorry, Kravinoff! But this is where I get off… government blueprints included at no extra cost to you, the Soviet spy/mental defective!” he bantered and with a farewell wave, Minute Man threw himself out of the airplane.
He dropped down and said, “Hope I packed the chute and not that suit I was to take to the cleaners!” A parachiye expanded and the mystery-man sailed gently down to a safe landing.
His Soviet foe’s plane crashed into a mountain peak nearby.
“Yikes! I told him not to trust that auto-pilot, but no, he had to try to choke me to death instead of flying the plane! Guess spies like him aren’t any brighter now than they were back in the 1940′s!” he mused.
He returned the stolen plans and received the thanks of his nation… yet again!
“No thanks are necessary. I am here to serve my country!” he told the President… again!
He returned to his small cafe. “The Minute Man Cafe just doesn’t attract business these days. I guess with McDonald’s, Arby’s, and all the rest available these days, my little place doesn’t cut the mustard, so to speak!” he mused.
The Cafe was located in the Southwest, and the dusty desert left Weston with little business, except for lost tourists.
“I guess that hobby of mine has taken too much time away from the business, but I’ll never quit being Minute Man. I mean, that’s who I am. Jack Weston and Minute Man are the same. The mask and costume don’t change my personality at all,” he said.
He dusted a shelf and pushed his jukebox. It played “Rosemary” by the Fascinators, and he hummed happily along.
“Guess that song means nothing to anybody under fifty these days. I still am about thirty-six because of the Sivana trap, but my tastes in everything from the decor to the music are around forty years out of day. Funny, a guy named Minute Man would be a golden oldy!”
He looked at a framed photo of actress Sandra Dee that lined his walls, along with Doris Day, Grace Kelly, Tuesday Weld, and Eva Marie Saint. “Oh Sandy, I guess you and the girl next door are long gone in this MTV era!” he said wistfully.
Then a beautiful blonde girl in a pink sweater and a long pink skirt entered. Her hair was swept back in a pink scarf. “Hi! My name is Sandra Dee. I bought the gift shop beside the Cafe. I guess you could say I’m the girl next door!” she teased.
Jack blinked and said, “Welcome, neighbor! My name is Jack Weston, and your name is…?” he asked, showing her a seat in a booth.
“It really is Sandra Dee, like the old singer,” she said.
“Actress. She was an actress. Her ex-husband, Bobby Darin was the singer,” he said.
“Right. She’s just a name I’ve had haunting me all my life! I own the book store/gift shop next door, so I wanted us to get acquainted,” she said. “I like your Cafe. It’s so quaint,” she said, running her hand over the plastic napkin holders.
“That’s me, all right. Mr. Quaint! I also answer to Mr. Weird or Sir Bizarre!” he joked. “Uh, listen, Miss Dee, would you like to join me at the circus? There’s a troop in town and I thought I’d take in the show. How about it? The peanuts are on me!” he asked nervously.
“I’d be delighted, except my boyfriend might object!” she said.
Jack’s face fell. “Oh sure. No problem.”
She left with a wave and he sat down in the booth.
Great! Too late once again! Hope at least the circus is fun! he thought.
***
In the big top tents, a sinister figure stood before a mirror. He wore garish make-up and had black circles painted around his cold eyes.
“The Black Clown is back once more in front of the lights and the roar of the crowd and yet again his reign of terror will begin! Come one, come all and let the Master of Terror drain you dry of every value you have!” Laughter echoed through the looming big top.
Jack Weston enjoyed the circus. He liked the old fashion spectacle and enjoyed the memories. You know, in this tent it could be 1940 or 1950 or any time at all! That makes me feel normal once more. I wonder if Captain Marvel has that feeling of being out of time? I had that time from before the Crisis to get used to things and all, but I just can’t quite adjust, somehow, he thought.
He watched all the acts eagerly, and tried to block out the fact that Duran Duran T-shirts and Madonna wanna-bes filled the stands where coonskin caps and poodle skirts were so recently in his memory.
That clown seems to run things. The Ringmaster seems a puppet in his hands! Every one of them turns to him for approval! he thought.
Then a scream echoed as a lion broke free from its trainer.
“Great guns! I better tame that kitty!” he said as he leaped out of the crowd and changed to the red pants and blue boots along with the white collared long sleeved shirt of red and white stripes that identified him as Minute Man!
The Black Clown was delighted. He had long fed off of the emotions of the crowd. His machines subtly bathed the audience in subliminal waves that drained them of reserve and moral values and drove them to increasing acts of madness. He used the energy the machines stole to power his own mental control of his troop. He just considered the corrupting influence it had on the crowd to be a sick thrill for his twisted humor.
The loose lion could spoil his plan, since the crowd had not been drained as much as he wanted. Without their energy to sap the will of his troop, the troop would not obey his orders to rob while some of them entertained the crowds!
Then he saw Minute Man drop down in front of the lion as it approached a little girl.
He scooped her up in his arms and said, “Don’t worry, honey. That big cat won’t hurt you. He just needs me to let him out for the night!”
He handed her to her mother who said, “Thank you, Minute Man!”
He turned to face the lion. It roared and he said, “You need anger management. I know people!” He jumped over its head and landed with a spin on the beast’s back. He grabbed the mane and said, “I guess I’m the Mane Man now!”
He pulled back and held the lion until everyone had scattered and the tamer could rope it down. “Now, that was some ride! I thought the subway was wild!” he joked to ease the crowd. As cheers broke out, he ducked under cover and returned to his seat in the dense crowd.
The Black Clown smiled. “Minute Man! The Hood wanted him dealt with, and I might as well do it. If I can enslave that do-gooder, then I’ll know my machine can control anyone! Perhaps even the Marvel Family!” His dark face brightened and laughter echoed once more.
***
The next night, Jack was out scouting the city on his cycle when he spotted a shadowy figure high above on a roof-top.
Shadowy figure plus roof-top equals action in the Minute Man school of the new math, he thought and stopped quickly. He climbed up the roof nimbly without a moment’s hesitation and soon heard whispered dialogue within.
“The Black Clown says this place is loaded with loot!” said a foreign accent.
“Hey, the Black Clown is always right!” replied his friend.
“The Black Clown needs therapy. How about we out him in light blue or green and call him the Pastel Clown. Those Miami Vice guys make it all the rage!” joked Minute Man as he leaped down.
“The Minute Man!” cried a brute of a strong man.
“Articles strictly optional!” replied Minute Man as he jabbed the man under each arm.
The brute dropped a heavy table on his own feet before he could smash it down on Weston. “That’s gotta hurt! I’d lay down a while. I’ll help!” he said, and punched the pinned brute in the face three times rapidly, then kicked him flat.
A knife whizzed by his head. “I think Sterling Morris owns the rights to the sound whiz!” he joked. He saw the wiry knifethrower and said, “You know something tells me you guys are with the circurs although that suit just screams Wall Street!”
He ducked low and pulled the rug the thrower was standing on. It tore in pieces. “They don’t make rugs like they used to in my day!” he said with a shrug.
He jumped high and spun down to land with a crash on the circus performer. He slapped him down and said, “I just know there’s an acrobat somewhere around here! There always is!”
He ducked as a third agile man dropped from above. He grabbed him and slammed him into the table the brute had dropped. “I recommend lemon-scented Pledge, but when in a pinch use the face of a thug!” he said. He rubbed the thug against the table and let him fall stunned.
He called the police and headed for the big top. “It doesn’t take the wisdom of Solomon to know that our Black Clown is the brains of this operation. I’ll just pay him a visit.”
He cycled over and eased into the crowds. “That creeps using some device to control the crowd. They’re turning money over to him too! Plus, getting mighty worked up and violent with each other!” said the astute Minute Man as he watched the Black Clown operated a machine in the biggest tent.
“Excuse me, are you a Mary Kaye representative? I have this rash!” he said as he ran inside.
“Minute Man!” cried the Black Clown.
“Not a minute too soon! I’ve used that line before, by the way!” he replied as he slugged the Clown.
The Black Clown sneered and said, “It’ll do my evil heart good to make you a puppet.”
“There are always strings attached to any good time!” declared Jack Weston as he dodged a punch from the evil clown.
The Black Clown grabbed Weston and choked him.
“Always with the choking these days!” he mused as he dropped flat and kicked the Clown over his head.
He rolled aside as the fast Black Clown kicked him in the head.
“He’s strong! I guess those rays give him added power!” mused Minute Man.
This was proven when the Clown swung Weston across the tent by one leg.
He kicked free and fell hard.
“I used to duel with Bulletman, but I can slay you as well,” laughed the Black Clown.
“I thought you clowns were all happy and fun loving,” asked Minute Man.
“Oh, it’ll be fun for me and make me very happy!” roared the foe. “I don’t have to beat you physically! I can let you die by your own moral code!” laughed the Clown.
“That would be better than letting you bore me to death,” said Minute Man.
“I’ll let the crowd battle to the death! Innocent lives lost in one mad stampede!” said the evil clown.
“No! I surrender! Just don’t hurt anyone!” offered a worried Jack Weston.
“Good! Tie him up and bathe him in the rays of my machine. Soon the good will die in you and you’ll be bad! Bad! Bad!” ranted the Black Clown.
“Are you trying to tell me I’ll be bad?” joked Weston as he allowed the gang to bind him and set him under the machine’s lurid glow. “Does this thing tan? I burn easily, but like a good tan!” he quipped as he thought of a way out. “I hate you! I will kill you!” he suddenly shouted.
The Black Clown smiled. “it’s worked already! Untie him and let him serve as one of our circus of crime!”
They freed Minute Man, who instantly decked both thugs with two swift blows. He darted forward to tackle the Black Clown, who screamed in surprise.
“You’re not under my control! It was an act!” he said as the hero slugged him again.
“You catch on quick for a man with orange hair!” said Minute Man as he roped the Clown with the discarded bonds that had held him seconds before.
“How did you resist my glorious machine?” asked the Black Clown.
“I am pure of heart. I’m a loyal old fashioned American and your kind can never ever beat us!” he said solemnly.
“Oh, and I unplugged the machine when I first sneaked inside! All it did was shine like a nightlight,” he added with a grin.
“Smart mouth!” said the Black Clown.
“Thank you, and nice eyes, too!” he replied as he led the evil Clown out of the tent.
***
Later, as Jack sat around in the Cafe he saw Sandra Dee enter with a tall man with blond hair and a chisled profile.
“Jack, this is my boyfriend, Devon Willard,” she said.
“Charmed, I’m sure!” said Willard.
“Same to you!” said Jack, extending a hand.
“Oh I don’t do handshakes. Germs, you know,” said Willard.
“And they know me!” quipped Jack.
“Well, we just stopped by to say hello. See you around!” called Sandra as she led the stiff Willard out.
“What a creep! I don’t like him… and it’s not just because he has Sandy and I don’t. He’s a jerk. Why does a girl like that go for a smug guy like that. He’s all flash and no substance,” complained Jack.
He hit the jukebox and “Blue Velvet” played. “Ah! This is living! Maybe I can find some old reruns on cable!” he said.
***
Later, as Devon kissed the sweet and spirited Sandy goodbye, he smiled and whistled a grim tune.
“Well may I enjoy the sweet surcease from sorrow offered by the nubile Sandra, for soon the deadly serious call to duty will sound and woe to those it knells for since that means the Laughing Skull walks anew!” he said madly.
***
Sharon Devine was tired after a long day working at the Devine Mutual Trust Insurance Company she had founded. She sighed and slipped on her coat as she headed home.
No sooner had she stepped outside the office, she was grabbed from behind and choked until she passed out. Her attacker wore white gloves and a white robe. If she had been able to turn to see his face, she would have only seen a stark white skull mask! He carried her off and laughed madly as he dropped a piece of parchment.
***
Minuteman sat grimly in the office of Police Chief Perry Dannon. The old man’s white beard shook with anger.
“I tell you Minute Man that this type of thing burns me up! Crime is bad enough without mind games. This Laughing Skull, as he signs himself, must be behind the Devine abduction and this note he left taunts us to catch him!” said Dannon.
“Look Chief, I think the note on artificially aged parchment, the name Laughing Skull, even the one witness account of him as a masked white sheeted ghoul all work to our advantage. He’s playing some sick game and sooner or later he’ll give us a lead to nail him,” said Jack Weston.
“If anyone can catch him it’s you. That’s why you’re here,” said Dannon. “What can my men do to help you?”
“Eat lots of vegetables, get plenty of sleep and remember to brush twice a day!” quipped Minute Man as he departed.
Chief Dannon smiled, “That guy always has a joke on his lips, but I’d trust him with my life any day! He just doesn’t lose! I’d bet on him over Mr. Scarlet, Ibis… maybe even Captain Marvel!”
***
Minute Man did joke constantly, but it was just his style. He felt as much horror at the crimes he encountered as anyone would; however, he had always believed that the humor made his job easier and kept him from becoming a dark avanger like the ever grim Spy Smasher.
He knew this Laughing Skull would strike again, and he hoped to solve the riddling rhyme the ghoul left behind.
“A nutcase who leaves rhyming riddles behind for the cops to solve! That could only happen on this wacky world! Those other Earths that popped up during that cosmic crisis couldn’t have creeps like that!” he mused as he pondered the riddle in his Cafe.
A blonde entered and called out “Yoo hoo! Jack? It’s me Sandra Dee!”
He jumped up and said, “Here I am, milady! Just putting on my face for the ball!”
“Jack! You kook! How’s business? Ooh! Bad topic. Still empty, I see,” said the cheerful blonde in the light green sun dress.
“It gives me time to ponder the deeper issues of life, like why are we here, Marcia or Jan et cetera,” he said with a rueful grin. “How’s your boyfriend Devon? Still the poster boy for bleach?” he said.
“Now that’s mean! He’s fine and you should not let him bother you. He’s sweet when you get to know him,” said Sandy.
Jack gazed longingly at her blue eyes and golden hair and said, “Yeah, I should be that lucky.”
***
Minute Man hummed along as Perry Como crooned from the Minute Man Cafe jukebox. He looked over the list of other vanished individuals and the copies of the parchment left behind by the Laughing Skull.
OK, three of them have no tie in terms of where they work or who they hang out with. But they did all work at one time or another in banking. So that’s this goon’s beef! He didn’t like the calendars they gave out or something, he thought.
“That list I charmed out of the local Banking Commission identifies three more targets who served with the missing trio on a bank loan board back in the 1950′s. With most of them retirement age now or even dead, that does narrow the field and his motive. Something offended him about that bank in the 1950′s. He’s obviously one of us caught in that whole Sivanium trap. Not that that narrows things very much.”
The scroll left at the Divine kidnapping read:
“Don’t guess wrong!
Heed Gumm’s song
Of St. Louis and
The suave bloodsucker!”
Minute Man frowned. “How do the three names fit that riddle? Which one is he telling me is next? Bloodsucker? Dracula? Vampires? Leeches! Suave… charming vampires? Lugosi? Leeches? The sauve Leech — Archibald Leech! Cary Grant’s real name was Archie Leech, and he was sauve!” he mused.
“A song of St. Louis? ‘Meet Me in St. Louis’ starred Judy Garland, and her name was really Gumm! I see his pattern for this one. Movie stars. What song was in that one? Something about Merry Christmas — no — ‘I just adore the boy next door’! That’s it — the victim is next to Grant! The actor next to Grant? No, too easy. The President next to Grant! That’s it! Hayes was after Grant and Hayes is a name on the list! I’ll pay Hayes a call tonight,” he said dancing around the cafe as Doris Day began to sing on the jukebox.
***
Bill Hayes lived in luxury in a mansion above the city on the hill where the community elite lived.
Minute Man was both impressed and out of place. He never had outgrown simple pleasures, even though he had been lionized by Presidents and kings and had seen exotic locales ranging from an undersea kingdom to Nazi Germany during the darkest days of WW II.
He sat in the shadows of the study while Hayes waited nervously for the Laughing Skull to strike. Weird laughter did echo out at midnight, and the white cloaked figure with the skull face loomed up out of the darkness!
“You know, this appearing at midnight stuff is so cliched! I’d expect that from some rookie but you old timer villains should really know better!” quipped Minute Man.
“You! My ally the Hood would pay much to see you dead!” said the Laughing Skull.
“Well, I’d pay a lot to see Dean Martin in concert, but we can’t all get what we want!” said Minute Man as he tackled the Skull. He slugged the masked man as they wrestled.
“Ya know you’re not really living up to your name. Sure, I see the skull motiff and it’s real nice. Not as grim as that of, say, the Skeleton, but then he was ten feet tall. But as I was saying, I don’t hear any laughing. Come on give me a good chuckle,” he joked as he kicked the white sheeted man down.
The Laughing Skull released a pellet of gas that made the room swin before Minute Man’s eyes.
“Oh, so now you’re more of the Gassy Skull? Giggling Skull? How about Black and Blue Skull?” he said as he covered his nose and pulled the sheet back to hold the struggling villain.
The Skull clawed Minute Man’s eyes and kneed him below the belt. Hayes rushed up to try to hit the villain but he was slapped to the floor. “You! I seek revenge on you and all your ilk!” said the Skull.
“Ilk! Now that’s a word you don’t hear much these days!” said Minute Man as he swung blindly to knock the Skull to the side. He dropped low and swung around to trip the Skull. He fell and pulled a knife. Minute Man grabbed a table and broke it over the Skull’s shoulder. He punched wildly and dropped his foe to the floor once more.
Hayes screamed and Minute Man turned to see the old man slump over in a faint! As he looked away the Skull broke a vase over his head. He dropped to the floor and then the Skull did laugh again and again. “I could kill you now! But better you should die with the bankers who ruined my father long ago!” said the Skull.
***
Sandra Dee knew she should not snoop around her boyfriend’s home, but while Devon Willard was late, she did just that!
She found a scrapbook with clippings about his father from the forties and a suicide! The book also had letters from a bank dated in the 1950′s. The letters refused a loan. It seemed clear to the lively Sandy that Devon’s dad had gone bankrupt and killed himself after a bank refused to get him a loan. She pondered how Devon could still be so young if he was around in the 1950′s.
She opened a trunk and saw a white robe and a skull mask! “This is the suit that murderer from the papers is supposed to wear!” she said.
She turned to see Devon glaring at her.
“Devon, I…” she began.
“Sandra, you must not question what I do. It is divine justice upon benighted souls who ruined a nobel spirit. I revenge myself for the death of my father. You will not give away my ID,” he said.
She shuddered and did not know how to answer. “No! No, I won’t!” she said.
“Ah, I see the doubt and fear in those lovely eyes. Now I must kill you as well!” he said.
She tried to run, but he was faster and stronger and soon had her limp form in his arms. “You’ll die with Minute Man and the others at midnight!” he intoned and then laughed coldly.
***
Minute Man woke up to see himself and three others tied to a wall in a dank basement.
Sandra was carried in as well, to his shock. She was dumped on the floor and the Laughing Skull said, “You are awake? Good. Then die knowing my true face!” He unmasked and revealed his handsome features.
Minute Man gasped for he knew Devon and already disliked him. “Put it back on! Please put back on the mask!” he yelled jokingly.
The Laughing Skull slapped him and said, “Jest, you popinjay. Die with these criminals who ruined my father and will pay in blood!”
“Do you accept American Express? I use it, being named Minute Man and all!” he replied.
The Laughing Skull looked longingly at the stunned Sandra Dee and pulled a switch. Spikes began to extend from the wall across from the prisoners. They inched toward them slowly. The laughter echoed as the white sheeted maniac raced away.
Minute Man thought rapidly. This old cliche is really lame, but it could kill us all just the same. Think how Spy Smasher and Ibis would laugh if they read about this!
He saw the flickering lights around him in sticks on the mantle. With a quick jerk he knocked one over and let the flame hit his boot. He inched the rope closer though the burning boot caused him pain. It snapped and he snuffed the flame and ripped his other leg free. The wall closed in even more and Sandra’s body was almost close enough for the wall to impell. He swung both legs up against the wall and braced himself long enough to break free. Then he grabbed Sandra and shoved her down so she was not in immediate danger from the looming chest high spikes.
He knew he could not free the other three in time, so he had to stop the moving wall. He ripped off his belt and wedged the steel belt between the edge of the moving wall and the floor. It held firm for a while. He leaned out as best he could to see arounf the wall. The switch was still down, He grabbed his burnt boot and tossed it across the room. It dropped the switch and the wall swung back just as his belt buckle snapped. He sighed with relief and cut loose the prisoners.
He kissed Sandra and yelled, “Look after her while I bag that fiend!”
Minute Man raced out of the old house, to see the Laughing Skull careen out of the dock in a speed boat. Throwing caution and himself to the wind, Jack headed up the slope and jumped off to land across the back of the speeding boat. He rolled to the side and desperately clutched for some hand hold. He caught a raised fixture and yanked himself forward.
The Laughing Skull turned at the noise of his foe scrambling inch by inch across the sleek boat. “Curse you! You plague me thusly! I shall pay you back ere long!” he screamed.
Minute Man stayed quiet this time and kicked out wildly. The Skull rolled back at the sudden impact. Jack landed in the boat safely and swung a right cross at the Skull. It hit, but the mad man fought back hard this time. He clawed at the masked man’s face and gouged his eyes. However, Minute Man lowered his head and held firm.
The clever hero suddenly reached over and yanked the steering wheel to the right sharpely. The Skull, caught off-guard for this tactic, fell forward and in a moment Minute Man pinned him down and ripped his mask off.
“You know I really should say something funny about now, but for once I think better of it,” he said as he tied the foe up and steered the boat back to shore.
Later, he held Sandra Dee in his arms and comforted her about her last boyfriend. “There’s a Moon Out Tonight” by the Capris played softly, and Jack knew it was a very good life.
